My Heart is so Heavy

I am sitting here with shaky hands, a pounding heart and tears in my eyes.  I just watched as my mom fell out of their truck as Dad was trying to help her climb into it.  Dad and I were helpless to help her.

You see, my mom is extremely overweight.  I can't even venture a guess at how much she weighs.  Carrying too much weight for most of her adult life has destroyed her knees.  She has no cartilage left in them, so they are bone rubbing on bone.  Both knees.  Extremely painful.  She has developed sciatica in one of her hips as a result of her bad knees and strain from the weight.  She can barely walk.  One of her legs can hardly even move anymore.   They won't operate, because she is too high risk for complications, because of her weight.

Dad is 70+ years old.  His back has never been the same since he broke it falling out of a tree 8 or 9 years ago.  And he has problems with his own knees.  It is getting nearly impossible for him to assist my mom with stairs and such anymore.   Dad can see that. 

Mom cannot.  She is in denial. 

Dad knows that they can't keep travelling.  There are getting to be too many falls.  And one of these times one or both of them is going to get seriously hurt. 

I am so sad.  Sad, because Dad isn't ready to give up travelling.  Sad, because Mom knows that and thinks that she can keep pushing herself even though she is pretty much immobile.  And the pushing causes her pain.  They are both hurting.  Physically, yes.  But, their hearts hurt the most. 

I know what they need to do.  I am sure that if they are truly being honest with themselves, they too know what they need to do.  But, the worrisome thing is that neither will admit it.  Scarier still is that I think one of them (or both) is going to get seriously hurt before they will admit it, when they will no longer have a choice.

Toad, Also known as Vicki's potential prince

We have a couple toads or frogs or whatever you want to call them living under our deck.  One is quite tiny and the other only moderately small.  They are both a greenish brown and bumpy. 

They frequently venture out from under our deck and hand out in our gardens.  I wasn't going to blog about them, because try as I might, I can't seem to get a really good picture one of them.   Everytime I find one hanging out in the garden, it sees me and runs, ahem, hops away.  And in it panick, hops right into the lattice that surrounds the space under deck every time. 

Every time. No ever accused a toad of being overly intelligent.

I have this one picture, but it is a little blurry as Vicki decided she couldn't stand still.  I think she was in early stages of peepeedancetosis. 

I have discovered a wonderful thing about having toads living under the deck.   Toad hunting (not in the death inducing I'm going to eat you way) occupies a 6 year old for extended periods of time. 

She has not yet named the toads.   Nor has she tried to kiss them.



Did you know that there is no difference between toads and frogs?  It is just two names for one crazycuteyetdisgustinghoppyjumpynotsosmart species.

The Fine Art of PB & J

Vicki was making Grandma a sandwich.  "PB & J's are the best," she declared.  

"You can't rush it," Vicki informed me.  "There has to be peanut butter on every part."

I like the red paper clip on the table.  I seriously have no idea where that came from.

Vicki carefully spread the peanut butter on all parts, right to the corners. 

"You have to put peanut butter on both pieces of bread so that the jam doens't make the bread soggy."

"Looks ready for the J!"

 

Spreading the jam, Vicki declared, "You can't put on too much at once, because then it makes a mess."

The sound on the video isn't that great, but what Vicki says is that she should go into business making sandwiches.  "Vicki's Famous Sandwiches" and she would charge $1.00.

Grandma said it was the best PB & J ever!

SQUEAL!

I am so excited about this arriving today!!!  I actually squealed.  I did.  It was a little embarrassing. 

Seriously, if you like cook books, (to say that I like them is a small understatement as I have shelves and shelves of them), go buy this cookbook NOW!  It is gorgeous and the recipes are amazing! 

The Pioneer Woman Cooks
Go.

Now.

You won't regret it.



Oh and FYI: Amazon.com is seriously the cheapest way to buy new books. I have not yet found anything that beats it. And just to give you an idea how awesome it is, I ordered these on Monday, chose free shipping (which they say is 4-5 days), got a shipping confirmation on Tuesday then received them today (Wednesday). OMGosh Becki! I am sooooo cooking something from this beauty today!

Darin is really going to wish he wasn't on a diet right now!

~*poof*~

Backyard Bliss, part deux

I am sure that the few readers I have are completely tired of my posting pictures of my measly little garden, but hey, it's my blog and I am very excited about my garden.  Be you couldn't tell!

The fruit garden - includes blueberries, strawberries, raspberries and tomatoes.

My sunflowers are getting huge and starting to bloom.  The back row are mammoth sunflowers. And there is a row of mixed smaller ones in front.  I ended up with only one red sunflower.  Check out the tallest one, its about 8ft tall!

A closer look at the red sunflower.

We experimented with planting corn.  We were unsure if they would get enough sunlight here, but they seem to be plugging along, although somewhat behind schedule.  I saw the first cob peeking out its amazing muppet hairdo this morning.

Our brussel sprout plants are finally making some wee little brussel sprouts!  I heart brussel sprouts.

Plans for next year are already in place.  The sunflower garden will make an appearance again, along with some more colorful flowers amongst them.  An herb garden will replace our vegetables in their current locations.  I love herb gardens.  It always amazes me how simple herbs, with their many shapes, sizes and shades of green can make a beautiful garden!  I anticipate chives, lovage, echinacea, cilantro, basil and many more will make an appearance. 

The vegetable garden is still up for debate.  The exact location is not yet determined due to the sunniest part of the yard is also the best lawn space for all of our backyard games, and somehow we need to fit the grape vines and fruit trees in there as well.   Oh, AND there is a battle brewing over raised vs. ground level garden beds.  I will win this battle, however I imagine that will mean building my own garden beds.  *smirk*

Backyard Bliss!!!

They say this weather is going to last awhile longer.  Well... yes please!

I love time spent in my backyard. Gardening.  Playing.  It's all good.

My tomato plants are over 6 feet tall at the highest point.  It seems that I somehow managed to cut off the top of this picture.  hmph.

They are loaded with tomatoes that I can't wait to eat!

My sunflowers are starting to bloom.  I heart sunflowers.

Some of the gardening isn't so glamorous.  I have one garden bed that I have neglected to weed in awhile and the morning glory is threatening to take over.  Guess I'll do that today. 

If I have to.

But it's too hot to weed.  So maybe it should wait.  ;)

I finally got to set up Vicki's pool yesterday. 

Yes, summer is almost over and I am just now getting her pool up.  It's a long story. 

I probably won't tell you.

I put the sprinkler in the pool so she could play in it while it filled.  Two birds, one stone.  I thought it was clever.

Ummm...  where's Vicki?  Well like I said, I thought the sprinkler in the pool so she can play while it filled was a good idea. 

She finally decided to check it out.  She is such a poser!

Well...  time to go pick Samm up from her friend's.  Maybe I'll even get some housework done....

Maybe not...

~poof~

I have an addiction...

Just one you say?

Well not really.  But, just one that I will discuss today. 

I seem to have a problem with spices.  Seasonings. Herbs.  Fresh. Dried.  Blends.  You name it. 

My spice cupboard is overflowing into the neighboring cupboard. 

I'm not exactly sure how it happened.  Do I really need so many varieties of cinnamon and curry?   Don't even get me started on all the varieties of vanilla. 

Oh Snap!

So I have just finished (but not really) cleaning out my closet.  Have a pile of clothes that I never wear that I have removed from my closet! YAY!  But, somehow, I have still have a huge pile of clothes that should be hung up but there is no room or hangers for them.  So, now what?  Thin it out more?  But, I have full intentions of wearing the rest of those clothes again.  I swear! 

I have a few items I would like to try something fun with.  I am going to give them away on my blog! None of these items are designer items, just clothes that I love and thought why not recycle between friends and family first, right?!?!  (totally stole this idea from the Pioneer Woman! thanks Ree!)

 If you would like any of these, please let me know by commenting with the item #.  One comment per item please.  I will send each item to the first person who requests it .   Otherwise, I will be donating them next week.

soo....   Here we go!

#1 - Dehlias blouse - size M, never worn

I love it.  Very pretty and feminine.  But the color is just so wrong for me. 

#2  -  Reitmans blouse, size M - gently worn.

Honestly, I really like this blouse, but I just never wear it. 

#3 - Unkown name brand - Size S - worn once

Cute 2 piece top.  Color in photo is a little off.  It is more green than teal.

#4  -  Dress - Label missing - size 11 - gently worn

Very cute dress.  The material hangs in a very flattering way.  I bought this after Vicki was born, but I lost the baby weight quickly and dress was quickly too big.

Flashback

I was clicking on some random posts from my old blog and came across this one and thought it would be fun to share it again...   (mostly because my sleepless night last night has left me sans brain and creativity)

"Thursday, September 21, 2006The Individual Writing Challenge #2 - POETRY this time. The theme? TREES.

Stop by the 360 Writers Blog for a list of all entries.

The Upside Down Tree

See me in the garden,

My leaves are rich and green.

My fullness is amazing,

I am surely a sight to be seen.

See me in the garden,

there is more than meets the eye.

Come look under my branches.
I'll surprise you by and by.

See me in the garden,
I am completely upside down.
My secret is hidden by my leaves,

I long to reach the ground."